#im just never going to recover
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#in stars and time#isat#isat siffrin#isat fanart#in stars and time fanart#siffrin fanart#fire draws#in stars and end poems#guys youll never guess what game ive been obsessed with lately#guys im not ok#im literally never going to recover from this game#ever#literally ever#mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm#as someone who has had so much trouble with rsd in the past#the ending of this game just. it meant so damn much to me#and then i started thinking about the end poem#and how much it fits the silly game#and i couldnt stop thinking about it#next thing i know here we are#i also tried out a new shading style with this one that was fun#anyways feel free to use this as like. a phone background or whatever#i only say that because thats what i do with fanart thats framed like this WOISEJKFD
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throughout dean's death scene he tries to hide his pain from the rebar stabbing right through him. he keeps smiling and tries to joke as much as he can to lessen sam's sadness because sam keeps looking at him all panicked and crying
like dean plays his own death off to be as sweetly as possible to sam he tries to assure him, coddle him as if when they were kids and he'd try to make sam laugh to take his mind off everything terrible in their life
#samdean#wincest#spn#sam winchester#dean winchester#supernatural#if someone looks for me tell them im still here#...shitting bricks crying rivers#going insane bc i remember that time they were fighting and dean proceeded to make every joke in the book#the butt of the joke was even himself too and it was all just because he wanted to make sam laugh#this happened in like s6-s8 and i never recovered. it was after the amy thing when they were sitting in the fortunetelling cafe#mine
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study date 😌
thank you so much @matchaprince for this lovely art of Cori and Y'shtola!! 💗
#they will def be studying. something#ANYWAY#oc: corisande ymir#y'shtola rhul#ffxiv#ffxiv art#THEY'RE SO CUTE!!!!!!!!#they look so happy and in love and like they are going to kiss SO much about it T^T#and i just love latte's shtola design so much 🥰🥰#and im so obsessed with cori's hair hlaksdhflas the curly ponytail is everything to meeeeeeee#they're sooo. cute i will simply never recover#corishtola#corishtola art#also. cori's nose T^T#comm
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PIETÀ
black pean [forceps] season 2 fucked me up :')
like, I'm going to be thinking about this still they posted on instagram forever, and I haven't even started on the cher juno letter
#im never going to recover from the cher juno letter oh my god#anyway thrilled to report that i burst into tears and cried like a fucking baby all the way through the last fifteen minutes of the#final episode like okay!!! OKAY!!!!!! im fine. aughhh. AUGHHH (head in hands)#ブラックペアン#black forceps#black pean#black pean spoilers#idk i dont usually spoiler tag when the show has been out for a minute if you want to avoid it everything related to it i personally#just use the main tag to blacklist. maybe black pean s2 is a better tag for how i organize this blog
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oh yea also the nimona movie is just really fUNNY. "Why didn't you tell us he was working with whales!!" FADSFHSDUGHADSGHA
#nnstuff#nimona movie#nimona#OK IM GONNA GO DO MY PERSONAL WORK BUT JUST KNOW ILL NEVER RECOVER FROM THIS
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I hate those posts that are like "who remembers this ?? 😝😝" And then it's a clip of mcsm with a burning passion but I saw one earlier that just takes the cake.
"Lukas is the most underrated character in this game" WHO??? LUKAS??? the. The blonde one. The perfect, charming guy that everyone loves. The one who is in 90% of all fanart. The one who is in jesskas, the most popular ship in this fandom. That Lukas???? BITCH ARE YOU STUPID???? DO YOU HAVE A SINGLE CELL IN THAT SMOOTH BRAIN OF YOURS, YOU FUCKING INSECT
#Makes me unreasonably mad. Get the fuck outta here.#minecraft story mode#mcsm#Not tagging Lukas cause idk if this counts as me shitting on him#I love you Lukas 🩷🩷 but DAMN#never utter the words “Lukas is underrated” ESPECIALLY in front of someone who's favourite is NURM#or Vos#Or the warden#Or Nell#Or LITERALLY ANY CHARACTER.#DUDE#Sorry my knees hurt and it makes me violent#FUCK I SOUND LIKE IM 90#Me and my old man joints 😔#ITS SO ANNOYING I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO DRAW ANYTHING FOR YALL THIS WEEK CAUSE IVE BEEN PAINTING FOR THE SCHOOL PLAY#BUT I HAVE JOINT ISSUES SO I LITERALLY CANT HOLD MY PEN CAUSE MY FINGERS AND WRIST ARE FUCKED#AAAA#I have tomorrow off to recover so I'll see if I can draw then but OUGH IM GOING CRAZY#I NEED TO DRAW I NEEEED TO DRAW#Anyways got off topic there aha oopsoes#I HATE THOSE NOSTALGIA POSTS WHERE THEY JUST STICK “WHO REMEMBERS” OVER AN MCSM CLIP#LIKE HONEY THE FANDOM IS STILL GOING STRONG#OUGH I KNOW ITS SUCH A DUMB RHING TO BE ANNOYED ABOUT BUT GUYSSSSSSSS SHUT UP#i am full of hate
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<33333
#holy shit this was an experience#im never going to emotionally recover from this.....#this is one of those stories that just irrevocably rewrites your brain chemistry forever#thanks to everyone whos been following the liveblog as well. glad you all enjoyed!!#isat liveblog#isat#isat spoilers#omg i can un-block the spoiler tag now#i can follow all the isat blogs#i can finally follow my mutuals sideblog!!!!
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A new sculpture! Finally... I feel like I never sculpt anymore since I'm always sick or have some 500 other things going on or projects to finish, but I'm trying to schedule time to do it more often this year hopefully..! Just a generic fantasy creature as usual, but did try making the eyes a little more sparkly this time.. hrmm..
#sculpture#fantasy art#fantasy creature#art#elf#lol what are the tags I should use... I still never know.. EVIL social media.. hate the idea of tagging anything ever anyway. but alas..#I also would ideally like to start selling them again and open up custom commmissions and stuff again once I can hopefully get paypal#stuff sorted out. and find like.. a good way to do things.. etc.. I did still want to sell them through auction instead of agonizing#over setting prices being afraid they're either too high or too low. So being able to just be like. Here. this is $50. or more. or less.#negotiate. the worth is whatever you feel like it is so i personally dont have to make that decision. etc. lol... But etsy doesn't let you#do auctions or like pay what you want type stuff so.. then I was thinking ebay? but idk.. ANYWAY.. I want to set things#up so I can sell stuff again hopefully. I still haven't fully recovered from the costs of when I had to take my cat to the vet and put#them down last year and etc. So it'd be good to sell a few things. perhaps.. maychance... perhamble... so on and so forthe... ANYWAY#I was going for whiter more milky sort of hair that blends in closely with the skintone but after the paint dried it seems more yellowy kin#of. which is fine. But just not exacltly like my mind vision lol..#Also it's like... wow... someone with face spots and elf ears and a half open mouth with a gap tooth and wavy hair and kind of downturned#eyes... revolutionary... never been seen before... every sculpture I have ever made surely doesnt look licherally exactly like this... LOL#but maybe it's just a style. so what. People have their motifs lol.. Im just getting back into sculpting. I shall sameface in peace. huzzah#Just like the only thing I ever carve out of avocado pits anymore is eyes. Because that's just whats fun to do. I'm going to accumulate lik#25 similar avocado eyes and have nothing to do with them. I was thinking of stringing some together into a necklace of eyes or something li#like that but.. hrmm... ANYWAY.. Love to do the same things repetitively. :3c
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I’m rewatching the qna thing stream from last night and I’m up to the part where they said my name and I’m still not over it like wow ok thanks everyone if you need me ima be a puddle on the floor bc they know of my existence now 👍
#And they said THANK YOU 😭😭😭😭😭😭#I will never recover from this :) /pos#Im gonna go to sleep soon but rewatching the stream just a bit before i do
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Cronus…. Colored.bass .. guitar …..
#If I had adult money it would be so joever#I make impulse purchases whenever I’m sad or stressed#cronus ampora#homestuck cronus#hs cronus#homestuck#home24uck#home2t4ck#Also im legally an adult (I’m 20) but since u become an adult at 18 im like technically 2 in adult years#When I get a big girl job I’m going to make so many poor financial decisions just you wait#bass guitar#esp guitars#ughhhh I love the color sm#Did you know purple used to be my favorite color from ages 0-high school#I stopped having a favorite color a while ago but purple’s coming back in full swing now#Thanks to you know who#(GEO Cronus)#God bless dalishthunder/pumpkinofthedale/chaussette_et_chaussures for making the best fanfic known to humankind#I’ll never emotionally recover from it
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🌦️&💤
on childhood best friends.
via ill give you the sun by jandy nelson // via the art of ponyo by hayao miyazaki // jack johnson, we're going to be friends // a message from my childhood best friend // mitski, i guess // via a little life by hanya yanagihara // adventure time, island song (come along with me) // via unknown // abba, chiquitita
#do you ever think about how momo was taught to weaponize her anger while mikan was taught to swallow his back. both as a means of survival#how momo probably admires mikans ability to hold it in. how mikan probably admires momos ability to release it all.#because i do. i think about it a lot#(BTW. IF YOU KNOW WHERE THE “let's go to the garden. let's be kids again. i'll chase you if you chase me.” IS FROM PLEEEASE LMK.)#the message is from the friend that inspired momo and mikan. btw she messaged me out of the blue and we chatted about our earliest memories#the whole “ohhh he came up to me offered me his hand and said you wanna go play with me because i was all alone” seems really unrealistic#BUT THATS. WHAT HAPPENED WITH US. WITH ME AND HER. i dont remember it very well which is funny and poetic in a sense. but SHE does... gugh#its because i was the one that went up to her... of course she remembers me offering her my hand because that meant the entire world to her#← OR SOMETHING. NEVER RUMINATE ON UR CHILDHOOD WORST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE its because my birthdays coming up im getting all weird. ugh#okay actual tags instead of my rambles...#web weaving#my wws#oc tag#momo tenki#mikan javier#on childhood friends#id in alt#nova noise#also hai sunny. (halo freak) one of these for kinzoku and gensou when. i will NEVER RECOVER#← silly slash lighthearted. i am just crazy over them you absolutely do not have to ^_^ i hope it doesnt come across that way
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"Im not even sure anymore if we get to choose who our friends are" There is a part of me that resents you for making me a worse person than i want to be but i am inexplicably uncontrollably drawn to you. You make me a worse person which is the last thing i want yet i want you in every way. If i could leave i would. Maybe i can but i dont want to. I have fun with you. You challenge me and you captivate me and you push me and pull and run circles around me and it makes me feel like a younger man. For the price of being a worse person i get to feel truly, wholly alive. You are the blood that runs through my veins; vital, inseparable. I was reborn when i met you and you are the womb that haunts me. You are the one person on planet earth who knows me. I wish i could leave, move on and be the man im supposed to be but my heart is tied to yours in a gordian knot. There is a part of my soul that rests in yours, magnetic. For as long as i love you i cannot be better than i am. But maybe thats something i can learn to live with. Gregory House-- I think you're worth it.
#house md#james wilson#gregory house#hilson#johan being crazy about yaoi md#johan's mindpalace#Im crazy#like im tearing up#this scene is so romantic it genuinely makes me nauseous#the lowlight setting the lingering stares the soft little smile a dam thats finally broken#I need a 12 gauge bullet in the thigh#Please watch this scene screencaps do not do it near enough justice#do you know whats so genuinely actually sickening#its been months since i finished house md#and i have not watched a single show that has managed to fill even a quarter of the gaping bleeding hilson shaped hole in my heart#shows that have actual gay people actual representation and not a single one has managed to alter my brain chemistry the way hilson has#since day 1 episode 1#Like its actually nauseating a little its so over for me for the rest of my life#Like im actually never recovering#people say “they dont make xyz like they used to haha” But Guys they Genuinely dont#Im going through withdrawls#I need my yaoi cocaine so bad but my plug died 12 years ago and i cant fucking Move#House md capital of fatphobia homophobia transphobia early 2000s edgy humour outshining modern shows with actual rep like im sick#Its not even because i want to like i feel like there are worms in my brain. I feel like ratatoullie if the rat was evil#This is not what the stonewall riots were for#I feel like so nausous why couldnt i be crazy about an actual gay pairing like a normal gay person. Im gonna throwup#Why couldnt i like music and girls#Its not even that house md is objectively logically better than these shows like no. Im just crazy#Im so sick they make me so sick i feel like there are worms in my head. My head#Dont know when i will ever be onorlmal again. Sorr
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#sev.screams#this is abt zzz btw#thinking about how android!reader will eventually outlive grace#unchanging metal against the transicence of flesh and bone#android!reader continually watching over belobog industries in grace’s honor#maybe a few hundred years in the future their parts will finally corrode#their wires snapping and their joints beginning to creak#and the new generation of engineers following in the footsteps of their predecessors#find an old android in a tomb of cables and silicone surrounded by old tv screens#the android has powered off. seemingly for the last time#the engineering team recover a data chip; perhaps there is useful information from those who came before#instead#all they find is a video of a woman smiling broadly#backed up enough times to contain several terabytes worth of data#i dont know where im going with this. just yet again obsessed w the idea of something that#was not built for the intention of loving but loves anyway. as best as they can#ursgagshdjdjsh i will never beat the hopeless romantic allegations
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I'm solely feeding into my sskk insanity here, but Atsushi's reaction is making me go crazy
Akutagawa still has full faith and trust that they're going to win and bring Fukuchi [potentially Fukuchi, I'm not like 10000% sure if it was confirmed yk] down together this time. He still has FULL faith and trust in his and Atsushi's abilities, and in turn, Atsushi himself, and seeing him respond with some fond ass smile upon that realization is so insane of them
#again im just letting myself feel sskk joy bc i miss them and i will always be a sskklvr™ at heart but obviously they're not canon#fisheye aside- i am never going to recover from this#GOD I LOVE SHIN SOUKOKU#bsd#bungou stray dogs#sskk#shin soukoku#atsushi nakajima#akutagawa ryuunosuke#bsd s5#bsd s5 spoilers#bsd spoilers#bsd s5 ep11#bsd episode 61
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u guys hear that? the sound of everyone adding Grease music to their oakworthy playlists? THE SOUND OF GAY PEOPLE GOING SORT OF REAL?
#also I want the sound of bangin Christmas hell music isolated SO BAD THAT WENT SO HARD?????? HOLYSHIT#im inconsolable#just finished the episode im never going to recover#making me wait TWO WEEKS TO SEE JIMMY AGAIN WAHHHHH#tfw even ur dad doesn’t notice you WHAT THE FUCK#POOR HERMIE#the doodle page will be coming but I’m still in class for an hour tragically so#dndads#oakworthy#dungeons and daddies
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Considering the. Ahem. Ways this year has gone, I've not been thinking about it all that much, but. I did start this year with the motto of Year Of Unfucking My Life. With a few goals involved in that.
I got an official adhd diagnosis, as well as a diagnosis for PCOS. Other diagnoses in progress. Gotten adhd meds and birth control to regulate periods. I've gone back to school and I'm keeping up with it better than ever before. I've even been working on practicing driving, something I've been largely neglecting since I first got my driving permit, um... 11 years ago...
I just need to actually Get my license. And I need to get it before the end of the year. If I can accomplish that, then I'll say the Year Of Unfucking My Life was successful.
#speculation nation#i had some pretty major negative And positive influences for this goal of mine.#primary negative influence of course being my dad abruptly dying.#but that also led to the primary positive influence of the life insurance payout that's letting me just focus on school for my final year.#it's like a monkey's paw curl kind of moment. i got a genuinely astounding amount of money#more than enough to live off for a year+ and pay off the rest of my schooling.#with this i have finally exited the purgatory of part time school full time work to pay my way through school#a setup that led to endless stress (both physically and mentally) and suffering grades.#failing some classes and taking longer bc part time Anyways. locking me into years and years of this perpetual fucking Hell.#ive escaped it. school is so so so much more manageable when i dont have to work a job. im actually keeping up with my assignments.#for once theres no uncertainty about passing any of my classes. i Will pass them all. and i expect As in most if not all of them.#it's been fucking Amazing. everything i couldve wanted. and it came with the low low cost of losing my father when i was only 26.#... 'low' being sarcastic here of course. he was the 2nd worst person i couldve lost in my life. second only to my sister.#the 2nd worst grief i will Ever experience. bc he was my Good parent. hes the very reason i have a future at All.#and losing him fucked me up Severely. im still working on recovering. i kind of figure i always Will be.#thank god id already been taking spring semester off bc that would've been Horrible to go thru while in school.#i honestly probably would've just withdrawn from the semester. theres no Way id have kept up with it#given how damned BUSY those first few weeks after were. between funeral prep and inventorying and packing up his house.#so fucking much involved in settling an estate. and im the lucky one in that my sister's been handling all the legal shit.#so i simultaneously was dealt one of the most severe blows i ever Will be dealt#while also being given probably the biggest boost i'll ever get in my life.#if everything goes well with graduating and getting an IT job then i'll never want for money again.#considering there was a time early last year when i got as low as literally $7 in my bank account. this is a pretty big deal.#it's just... strange. the ways things go in life. this has been a very strange year for me.#just doing my best to use this boost to the best of my ability. even if it feels like im taking advantage of his death.#it's what he wouldve wanted me to do.
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